These are questions that are often asked about Carolina Transgender Society.


What is Carolina Transgender Society all about?
What can I expect at a meeting?
What do you do at a meeting?
Will I be judged on how well I "Pass?"
Do I have to come dressed as a woman?
I have no experience with makeup. Can you help?
I don't own a wig. Can you help?
Is there a dress standard or code?
I'm not bothered by drawing attention. What does it matter?
Will I have to reveal my name or other personal information?
Do you provide counseling?
Will I be accosted by someone looking for sex or interested in dating transgendered people?
Do you charge for membership?
Can you help me with my wife/partner?

CTS is a group that exists to give you a place to get out of your closet, be safe and accepted, share, learn, grow, and generally be comfortable. We want you to become more comfortable with yourself and around others. While most of us are MtF, we welcome all types of crossdressers, masculine, feminine, and androgynous.

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What can I expect at a meeting?
Rather than the stereotypes you may have seen on television, you will find that we're a bunch of pretty normal people who dress pretty much like normal women (GGs) and meet only to socialize and participate in various group functions. Our meetings are simply an opportunity to get dressed, perhaps go out, and be with our good friends. We range in age from our 20's to our seventies and come from a wide range of professions. Most of us are married and some have kids. Often our wives attend the meetings with us.

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What do you do at a meeting?
Our meetings are very informal. Our meetings are not structured like AA (“Hi, my name is Nancy; I'm a crossdresser. I haven't worn men's clothes in 2 weeks!” )
We meet at safe location in Charlotte. Members begin arriving on Friday evening, and some stay through to Sunday morning. Saturday activities range from socializing to shopping at local malls or consignment shops. We may have a guest speaker or a video; we always have sharing time. In the early evening, most dress for dinner after a brief business meeting. Some night owls go out to one of Charlotte's night spots after dinner.

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Will I be judged on how well I "Pass?"
No. We're not running a beauty contest. Our members range from hardly convincing to completely passing, heavy to thin, tall to short. Some of us dress up, and some dress down. For your first meeting, you may want to wear something nice but not particularly sexy or dressy. When you first walk in, you will be warmly welcomed, because you'll be among friends.
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Do I have to come dressed as a woman?
No. We meet at a hotel where many members take a room for the weekend. We also have the use of a Hospitality Suite, where changing facilities are available. If you wish, you may bring a change of clothing and decide once you arrive and socialize whether you would feel more comfortable changing. New attendees are given considerable understanding, latitude, and assistance.

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I have no experience with makeup. Can you help?
We have members who are very experienced in both dressing and applying makeup. We will be happy to help you learn how. Sometimes we have makeover sessions with professional vendors.
In the meantime, you may find some help from Nancy's web site Crossdresser Information in the article "Makeup for the Crossdresser." She also has an article on "Shaving for the Crossdresser" that may be useful as well.

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I don't own a wig. Can you help?
We can assist you with that also. We have several friendly vendors who can supply you with a beautiful wig, without embarrassing you. Some of our members also sell online through several venues and may be able to supply one that way as well.

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Is there a dress standard or code?
Not a dress code, per se. We do require that you dress as either a male or a female. We ask that you dress within the bounds of good taste. There are often spouses present at our meetings and we do not want to offend them. Additionally, we prefer you don't wear clothing which attracts undue attention. Most of our members dress in clothing appropriate for the time of day, occasion, and their age. If the GGs around you are dressed like you, then you're doing right.
Fantasy clothing is best left in your closet or perhaps at the Halloween Party. For example, wearing a dress and a beard would not be appropriate. Like a 10 inch miniskirt or super high heels, it would draw too much attention. And while it might be fun to look like Dolly Parton, that also would ordinarily draw too much attention.

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I'm not bothered by drawing attention. What does it matter?
Remember that Carolina Transgender Society is a support group. At all times all members must keep the safety, security, and comfort of all other members in mind. You may feel quite comfortable as an exhibitionist, but if your activities cause other members to feel uncomfortable, you are not assisting our mission.

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Will I have to reveal my name or other personal information?
No. You can be as open or anonymous as you wish. We've all chosen to adopt femme names and only rarely use last names. Most of our out-of-meeting communications are done via Yahoo groups, which require an email address, but it can be an "anonoymous" email, such as a Yahoo address. As a matter of fact, most members don't want to know your legal name or address. We no longer request a written application, so there is no such record.

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Do you provide counseling?
Only Peer-to-Peer. Many of our members are very experienced. We have no professional counselors. Some of our members do go to professionals and will be happy to refer you.

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Will I be accosted by someone looking for sex or interested in dating transgendered people?
Absolutely not! Those interested in meeting/dating transvestites or other transgendered people are unwelcome at our meetings, and nothing of a sexual nature is permitted at any meeting.

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Do you charge for membership?
We have a very low membership fee which basically covers the basic costs of running the group. We also collect a meeting fee from attending members to defray the cost of our meeting room and other expenses.

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Can you help me with my wife/partner?
Yes and no.
We do have a sub-group for significant others. They also have their own (private) chat group on Yahoo!
SOs are welcome at the meeting, and even encouraged. The SO Group leader is at virtually every meeting. If necessary, the SOs can go to another room to have their own meeting. This group will be glad to help your wife/partner feel less threatened by your "hobby."
They do not offer "counseling" other than peer-to-peer discussion.
If you can't get your SO to a meeting, they may want to at least email the SO group leader through this web site.

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